Cup of champions

In which G.M. Norton takes ownership of a specially crafted drinking vessel.

If one was to describe your favourite protagonist in a single sentence, it would probably be as follows:

A moustache-wearing, tea drinking lefty.

Now I am not hinting at my political preferences with the term ‘lefty’, I am merely proudly stating that I am left-handed, or southpaw if you are a fan of American rounders.

With these three nuggets of information, it brings me on to the subject of this week’s periodical posting. That of a recently launched company, by the name of My Moustache Cup.

Eagle-eyed readers may have already spotted a little advert on this very periodical in support of this most splendid of drinking vessel manufacturers.

I was first alerted to the existence of said drinking vessel manufacturers on the Twittering Device. Following an appeal for a moustache cup, the lovely Tom from My Moustache Cup dispatched a message in 140 characters or less by way of introduction.

If you’re not familiar with the term ‘moustache cup’, it is not to be confused with a mug simply bearing a moustache on the side. A moustache cup is actually a specially made drinking receptacle with a little ‘ledge’ on the inside to keep your top lip topiary from getting wet or steamed from the hot liquid inside.

Popular in the Victorian age, when large upper lip appendages were standard issue for any self-respecting gentleman, demand for this ingenious tea drinking implement sadly dwindled somewhat.

Thankfully, My Moustache Cup have now emerged to save hirsute men from a condition known as ‘lipsweaselsoakia’.

As well as offering a number of ready-made moustache cups, this Lancastrian company also deals with bespoke orders. Naturally, I couldn’t resist placing an order for a left-handed cup made to my exact requirements. Marvellous.

Giving Tom my brief, but allowing him creative licence, he produced a rather charming sketch. Note, the Norton of Morton bowler and handlebar, using a little technique called ‘sgraffito’.

Being a splendid chap and all round good egg, Tom proceeded to send me pictorials of my self-coined ‘Cup of Champions’ during its journey from clay ball to finished cup.

Here it is, freshly 'thrown', removed off the potter's wheel and placed onto a drying board...

The handle, moustache and sprigs are affixed...

A 'decorating slip' is then poured over the up-turned cup before being flipped around again. Oo-er...

The signature-style 'sponge dab' decoration is then applied before the drinking vessel is left to dry for one whole week...

After a good firing, it looks a little something like this. Note the rather nifty 'sgraffito' decoration...

As if that wasn't enough, my moustache cup also arrived gloriously packaged. 

Gadzooks!  

It has been an absolute joy to deal with My Moustache Cup. Old-fashioned customer service at it's very best. With 25% of profit going to Prostate Cancer UK, it would be rather rude to turn your moustache up at supporting a British enterprise.

G.M. Norton

Protagonist of 'Norton of Morton'