In which G.M. Norton is invited to partake in a brilliantly British tradition - moaning.
Fellow Vintage Manchester blogging finalist, Helen off of
Mancunian Vintage, recently invited me by way of ‘blog tagging’ to commentate
on the declining conundrums of society.
As a glass-half-full sort of chap (especially if it
contains single malt), I prefer not to focus on the negativity of modern life.
Although by harking back to days gone by, I suppose I am already doing so, if
indirectly.
Of course, if moaning was a national sport then Britain would be on the podium spraying champagne before complaining about the mess it was creating. As I consider myself to be as British as the last slice of cucumber in a glass of Pimm’s, I have allowed myself a brief break in jolly transmissions and present to you the three things that get my undergarments in a twist.
Mobility scooters
Ah, the scourge of the streets, the thorn in my flesh. Now,
please don’t misunderstand me – I am all for people who would normally struggle
getting out and about having means to do so. I just wish it didn’t involve
mortal danger.
Danger! High Voltage |
I read a story in the local newspaper last year where an
elderly chap in a mobility scooter was involved in a hit and ‘run’ with a young
lady on her way to work. Rather than stopping to check on her well-being, the ‘driver’
made a swift getaway, running over the poor damsel for a second time.
This year, one like-minded fair maiden fed up with
dancing with death, even resorted to submitting a petition to Downing Street.
People who don’t give up their seat on public
transport
We know who they are. The bad apples who refuse to give
up their seat on public transport when a dear old lady comes on board,
preferring to hide behind their mobile telephones and other electronic
equipment.
Disgraceful goings-on |
My beloved encountered this very such problem almost
every day when she was heavily pregnant with our youngest.
The rotters. Or to paraphrase Terry-Thomas, “What an
absolute shower!”.
Plain bad manners
On a conjoined topic, too many people these days have a
complete disregard for good manners. Now the country may be on its uppers but
that is no excuse for dropping the most basic social skills of ‘please’ and ‘thank
you’.
This week, my gentlemanly ears pricked up with news of a
new hero in town, Captain Manchester to be precise. This comic-reading fellow
is sadly unemployed but being a decent sort, he’s trying to make my home city a
nicer place by actually helping other people.
From reading about him on the Twittering Device, Captain Manchester has carried out a number of helpful acts such as assisting students trying to move a settee and taking people’s bins out. I applaud his selfless spirit.
I admit, it is a shame that his superhero ensemble veers
so dangerously to leisurewear but one can’t have it all. I did suggest to him
the notion of tweed for the colder months but he didn’t seem convinced on being
able to achieve the freedom of movement he is used to.
The outfit for heroes |
So, there you have it.
Now it seems that I need to ‘tag’ others into this
moaning malarkey. So I pass it on to the following good eggs:
G.M. Norton
Protagonist of ‘Norton of Morton’
Protagonist of ‘Norton of Morton’
P.S. Chumrades, if you’ve not already done so, I would be
extremely grateful if you could lend me your vote for Best Vintage Lifestyle
Blog. Voting ends 30 September. Many thanks!
All superb quandries and complaints to air - I salute you! ;)
ReplyDeleteWhy thank you, kind lady. And best of British with the Vintage Manchester awards! I am honoured to have joined you as a fellow blogging finalist.
DeleteI agree with you entirely, my dear fellow; well said! Thank you for passing this little blogging stress relief valve on to me as well - like your good self I always try to dwell on the positives of life but I have no doubt that I can unleash my inner Victor Meldrew on at least three things, yes by Jove!
ReplyDeleteThat Captain Manchester chap sounds like the right sort too, I must say.